Our Neighbors are trying to steal our ducks!
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
you can SEE the outline of a pad through her jeans. there is no way
If you're trying to subtly tell me that I look like Connie Chung, just stop it. I already know.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Thanks to her sunglasses tan, I can't look at her when she blows me cause it's like getting blown by a raccoon. A very talented raccoon
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
In other news my pubic hair is covered in glitter.
She sent me a thank you card for not fucking her boyfriend...
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize