Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Hahaha. I am actually really tight for having a kid. Like really really tight.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
Oh dude, thanks for giving me that liquor last night, except replace 'giving' with 'violently forcing'.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Randomize
