Im telling you now. Hang out with winning football players and you get whatever the hell you want. Sorry to wake you. But its important knowledge.
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
This frat boy drinking a forty and wearing a pussy patrol shirt just ran out in front of my car. I should have used less brakes.
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
There are twenty eight units in that building. There has to be at least one heterosexual in it. You can't have fucked your way through all of it.
Just bought 2 liters of wine and frozen waffles for dinner. Is this 30?
Randomize
