Omg my grandpa just told me he wants to die in his 90's shot by a jealous husband
reasons why jon gosselin is probably ur biological father: 1. ur half asian 2. hes everyones biological father 3. u wear ed hardy
sounds legit
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
do you think theyll let us bring mariachis to the strip club?
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Probably gonna run and pray I throw up. Then go get a coffee/bagel & continue to rally
You haven't demanded nudes today. You alright?
I just noped my wife on Tinder. Turns out I was the second one to find out that we both have it.
So I told him "To answer your question yes I am naked making pizza pops in your kitchen"
Bring shot glasses to the final. Don't ask questions.
the twins are trying to figure out which one is the one doing body shots off a janitor in this picture
Randomize
