TIT CHECK! TIT CHECK! ALERT! ALERT!!!!
i refuse to live in a world where loud threesomes in your own apartment are referred to as "rude"
did you yell "are you not entertained?"
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Do you think the Slutcracker will use the original score? I'll be so sad if they don't.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
She came back in her actual cheerleader uniform. Made a bad bj tolerable.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Sunday is the day of rest.
As in, whatever liquor is left after last night, you have to drink the rest.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Can't really tell your Mom you are moody due to dick deprivation.
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
When I woke up I was spooning with a block of cheese. Like, cuddling. Me and the cheese we nestling...
Randomize
