Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
I just put anything in between my legs and hope for the best.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
If tjhis were a lake full of vodka and i were a ducl Id swim my way down and ddrink my way up
i proceeded to stick my hands in his pants while he continued to repeat i have a girlfriend
Too bad they don't have an emoji symbol for condoms and 99 cent tacos
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I woke up with a stapler in my ass. Don't even complain to me.
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
i may or may not have bought a plane ticket for a russian cam girl to fly here. also, can you spot me $300 on rent?
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
Randomize
