do you believe in love at first sight?
awwwwww =)
yea.. so can i have your sisters number? thanks!
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
Yeah I think we tried to use the shower curtain as a parachute because its tied to my backpack with some string. Dont know if anyone actually attempted it though.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
You took my underwater blowjob virginity.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Yea I almost drowned giving a BJ in the shower once
I may have just poured a honey apple beer onto a dried apple slice to rehydrate it. This is my day.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
He stuck a cigarette in my butt last night. There is no coming back from that.
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Randomize
