ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I just woke up under a kitchen table with my sandals taped to my feet and a corona bottle taped to my hand..
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
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I did that thing again where I get way too drunk and go gay. Then wake up in the morning and freak out at the person. Yet another bar I cannot go back to
i noticed he has a cardboard window on his car and he told me he locked his keys in his car and had to break in...this only makes him more appealing
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I don't like finding out that my fuck buddy is a good person.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
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i'm soo broke, the only trip i can afford for spring break is acid
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Blocking me on Facebook doesn't change the fact that you've had my penis in my mouth. So there's that.
I've started budgeting for next year. It looks like I'll be crying tears of dollar bills and handing them over to pay back my unholy college debt.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
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