So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
I'm so high that a hulu ad convinced me to go on healthybaby.com
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
She left her panties here. They looked SOOO much smaller last night.
I woke up in a lawn chair by the lake to some man revving his boat motor at me.
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize
