brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
Any little, cute, petite blondes with you?
Nah, I got some slutty brunettes though.
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
I'm really sorry we tried to have sex on top of you last night.
Apparently I was pointing at birds and yelling "YOU USED TO BE A DINOSAUR!!!"
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
I have a half pound of weed, a case of beer, 8 frozen pizzas and a hard dick. You have a high tech super-bong and a chest of sex toys. That's our vacation week right there.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
Did I literally just offer a blowjob for help moving? Yes. Yes, I did.
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
Randomize
