She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
I just found 'pokemon orgy' in my search history
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I am actually insulted by the long string of ugly, fat girls he hooked up with after me.
My body is being held together with whiskey, nicotine, duct tape and a little bit of hope...
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
I just washed out an empty chocolate milk bottle to take whiskey on my bike ride.
You are not an adult
I woke up without my clothes on covered up with a towel on the floor because for some reason I took a bath in my clothes at 2am.
Can you plz delete the video of me twerking in Waffle House, my mom just got a vine.
to drive Frat boys away, one just needs to cat-call at them. It makes their masculinity weaker, and yours stronger.
I legit feel like I had sex with Joey Fatone. Is that weird?
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Dude I can't beleive you didn't wake up. I literally f'd her IN THE DISHWASHER. Btw I'm pretty sure I also kinda broke the dishwasher.
No I’m scared man. She sharted. In my car. Wearing a dress. And I still like her.
Wow
Randomize
