I want my own midget army. I think I would be a good midget army leader.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
She was singing my heart will go on into her barf bag. celine aint got shit on her.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
no drinking for a week
if by week you mean tonight and by no you means yes
Wait is it okay if I still want to fuck the whole USA swim team or is that only acceptable during the Olympics?
This is why Helen Keller didn't drink
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
I tried snowmobiling at 2 am. I broke my glasses. You're right. Things do get out of control.
did you just say you're too stoned to fool around? okay we're over.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
There are peanut butter donuts now. We are playing with forces we can't possibly understand.
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Randomize
