Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Drinking in an igloo changes everything.
I thought he was kidding when he said pretend to be a dunkin donut delivery women. This is the last time I ever role play.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Next test. Underwater blowjob. If you fail...out of water blow job
I plan on being naked for at least 2/3 of the wedding.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
I just had a great idea for an etsy shop. Sell all the shit bitches leave from one nighters
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
They used the ice bucket from their room to drink beer from and called it the "Holy Grail"
Well I'm about 60% wine, 30% pure rage and 10% tears at the moment and I'm disappointed in how little alcohol is in me
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
He somehow always manages to get me naked within 5 minutes of being together. It's like fucking witchcraft.
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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