Brutally Honest is my real middle name, Princess just sounds better.
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
He came up behind me making dolphin noises in my ear when I noticed a collection of hors d'ouevres from the reception earlier in his jacket pocket
I will never doubt you again...he IS perfect for you
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Holy hangover, going dancing with family good idea, taking the last shot with the transvestite bar owner not so much...
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
She went to her drug test stoned.
And strangely enough, we all know she'll pass it.
How drunk is she?
She's trying to French braid the dogs hair, there's no stopping her
Only you would have a vasectomy while you're awake and report on the soundtrack first
So please don't worry, but I need some help getting blood out of my drywall so I can get my security deposit back. I would not ask if the need was not great.
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
Remind me to tell you about how I hit a tree with my car last night.
I'll be glad to.
Dear god my vagina.
He’s got a big dick and a big ego. This could be fun
Randomize
