hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
Did you know Kal Penn works at the white house? That's almost white castle.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Wine + wine + wine + wine + bud light = puke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
That's true. There's really no bad time to take a Vicodin.
It is the Reeses peanut butter cup of pharmaceuticals.
I don't know... But I do think this is probably the longest series of texts we've written discussing your cock. David was right, it is a brave new world. Also, slow day at work again?
This reminds me of the time I was given a lap dance by a David Bowie drag king...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
She knocked me and my drink to the ground with her ass. I have never been mad at someone for having a glorious booty.
Only I could go on a date with one guy, have a beer with a different guy and go home with the guy im trying to avoid. I have a talent or a problem.
My husband gave me a key to his house. I thinks this means we're getting kinda serious.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
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