I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
I'm on the strip, it's like a mini new years eve. Some girl just got taken away on a stretcher with her meter margarita in her hand claiming it's trophy for being awesome. Damn tourists are lightweights.
MY DOG FOUND A BAG OF COKE ON THE SIDE OF THE ROAD!!!!!!!!!!!
AND ITS GOOD STUFF TOO!!!!!! AHHH!!!!!!
it's like a walk of shame rule, you always run into someone who saw you wearing that yesterday
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
I will be naked everywhere
Using all my books as packing buffer for my liquor bottles. And you said being an English major was worthless.
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
he sent a dick pic to my best friends phone for me cause mine died lol pretty sure he was regretting that night outta town.
My vagina is very pro this idea
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