Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Idk if you've ever had the pleasure of 1. Vomiting on a sidewalk - at 3 in the afternoon 2. Vomiting nachos or 3. Vomiting nachos out of your nose but really I do not advise any of the above.
yea, their son has been arrested on more than one occassion, their daughter is pregnant and their other daughter graduated but she was adopted, so clearly genes are everything.
21 People Tragically Stumbled Upon A Dead Body
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
He doesn't have any game.. I mean, his one move is forwarding chicks pictures of his penis.
It took all the strength I had tto sit at my desk and not tear off my business attire and run screaming from adulthood and flourescent lights.
I actively tried geting in the guy's pants and ended up in the girl's. I'm bad at this whole straight while drunk thing.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
27 Socially Expected Things That Are The Absolute Worst
Your smile makes me feel like I'm frolicking through a field of gummy bears.
There's nothing quite like having a little 8 year old boy hand me a Bible on campus while I'm on my way to the health center because of my recent slutty tendencies.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default