Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
nothing like a tattoo of a large eagle attacking a small eagle whos attacking a shark to bond to siblings together for life
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You can't just call animal control when you're drunk because there is a bug in the shower.
Well I smoked some weird shit and I think I peed on my phone.
Her neighbors? They're nice. Young family. Tried not to get puke on their side of the lawn.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
Sex in a tree, bucket list CHECK!
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