If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
Its 6:30 and I'm shotguning a busch ice while taking a shit. Outlook for work today: interesting
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
We shot off some fireworks at 12 and then I orchestrated the group singing of god bless the USA all while wearing a don't tread on me flag as a cape. I repped hard.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Had dinner with a married woman but didn't have sex with her. Tweeted at Mike Pence to apologize anyway.
Is there a number of dicks a girl can have in a weekend before it becomes unacceptable? Asking for a friend
Remember! It’sa long weekend and a holiday weekend and it’s America’s birthday! So don’t short change me!
I thought you were asking for a friend
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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