I've been thinking about all the girls in my life in terms of applying to college.
Huh?
I guess what im trying to say is that your my safety school.
im covered in puffy paint and glitter i cant find kevin and im wearing shoes that dont belong to me....come get me please
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
I don't think he understands the importance of corndogs. Or condoms for that matter.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
Lets just say I chased with a burrito.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I could probably be laying here naked and he'd still be more interested in this thunderstorm
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
can you bring the lube to algebra tomorrow
Randomize
