My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
I just ran up four flights of stairs in heels, im getting an orgasm tonite.
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I was topless in his bathroom sink taking bong rips , goodmorning . He told me he could get use to this
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
I took the pregnancy test for shits and giggles, but neither shits nor giggles were had.
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
I put purple lights under my bed and asked him if he wanted to fuck in a spaceship.
We're listening to drake in the middle of the woods and smoking two joints at once...my life is complete.
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
that sounds horrible...
what could possibly go wrong attempting to re-enact the dinosaur capture scene from Jurrasic Park... I have the net gun and camcorder you have the dino costume and can run
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