every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I knew the sex would be bad when he slipped the rubber on and said "safe sex activated"
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
Steve is gonna hang his bear rug on the wall because he doesn't trust us not to have sex on it...
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
It's fine...I've done worse things to better people.
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
On a scale of one to ten how bad is it that the first cardio I've done in months is jogging to the bars?
I'll just go with dedication.
Randomize
