he only lasted three minutes, so to spite him i stayed the night and slept in.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
In case you were wondering, my scare crow is wearing your outfit from last night.
Yes, do intervene. Unless it involves cowboys with loud trucks and hard 9 inch dicks. Then just come back for me in the morning.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
The cop that got shot in the dick is here, let the entertainment begin.
Idk woke up on the suite in someone else's clothing and actually broke my ankle
Ok, maybe playing "whose family is most dysfunctional" wasn't the best drunk idea we've had. Todd''s been crying in the bathroom for an hour. We can't get him out...
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
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