her nipple to breast ratio was just odd
Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
😂😂😂 what are we doing to these poor guys?!
Maintaining the status quo.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
honestly i've never been more attracted to you than when you threw up on my floor
Randomize
