I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
Brickbreaker makes my post drinking poops that much better. Sorry, I had to tell someone who might agree.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My rats are drinking wine. I am drinking with rats. God i am so alone.
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
I definitely made out with a high school student last night while his sister and my brother were in the same room. I think we're all traumatized by the situation.
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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