Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
He tried to carry her to her room after she passed out, but when he picked her up she came back to, saw him, screamed rape and pulled out her vuvuzela app and blasting it like a rape whistle.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
She ditched her BF in the library to come see me wasted at a house party and i still ended up banging that rugby chick instead.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
Just pull your dick out and wink at her, its a game changing play
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
James is trying to butt-heads with a moose. I don't know whether I should stop him or just sit back and watch where this goes.
When my mom found out he was a high school drop out she was like "seriously? Can we raise the bar a little higher next time kels?" So my moms pretty cool
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I'm not snubbing your weed I just had a really important rack of ribs to get home to
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I gave your mom a discount on her coffee, its my way to say thanks for having a son that makes me come every time
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