then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Do you remember that blonde girl he brought home from the bar on Friday night? She didn't leave until Monday afternoon. We didn't even know she was still in his room...what a sketchy weekend.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
I had to do a class evaluation today & the girl beside me didn't fill in any bubbles she just wrote in huge letters RETIRE across the whole sheet
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
Just took the worst coed shower ever. We both cried. AND I only shaved one leg.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
The last time you said "no one will know" is when you ran out of sprite at your birthday party and dumped a handle of straight up vodka into the jungle juice.
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I found a hot kiwi last time and sucked his dick. That's what rooftop bars are made for.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
Randomize
