White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I've decided to film a documentary centered around how he manages to keep that beast caged in such tight pants
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I can't help but be optimistic. I'm like a ball of slutty sunshine.
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
The amount of dicks I have seen in the last hour is more than I have seen in my whole life.
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
She has a girlfriend too.. we decided that two cheats equal eachother out to zero. with our flawed grasp on algebra and the bottle of jack we were passing back and forth the logic seemed airtight.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
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