I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
Slutapocalypse this thursday. Invite every freshieee you hooked up with this semester to my house. Think of it like a meet n greet for them and battle of the sluts for us.
No one would take shots with Caroline so she asked the bartender for like 20 jagerbombs and then shouted "JAGERBOMBS FOR HOMELESS ANIMALS BENEFIT" and everyone started doing them with her
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
I just had my first lesbian experience. Out of spite.
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Randomize
