and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
guys are only as good as the porn they watch
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
I decided they need a food cart that just roams around the library like the cotton candy people at the circus. But with real food. like tacos cause it sounds delicious.
Maybe. This hangover is made of nightmares and that thing from the Alien movies.
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
Nice. The Governor's son bruised my vagina.
That's going to be the title of my memoir.
reason #326 why I'm still single.... my date just told me there's a little boy ghost that lives in his closet because he likes his music.
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
There are 6 of us in a mini cooper and his maid is in the trunk...she needed a ride.
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