I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
my boobs just fell out on the dance floor. my wedding is totally beating your wedding
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
got blackout drunk at the conference and wandered around Minneapolis with a homeless person until one of the other interns found me...I think I'm ready for adulthood.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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