I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
So yes it WAS her period, NOT a nose bleed.
Sorry if I ruined your sex last night with my constant text updates about the plot of Bolt.
I just hit a new low..poured my beer in an empty coke can so I could drink in walmart.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
This is like a relationship, I expect to be mind blown at least once a week.
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
No, man, we stole the housekeeper's key and we're just going room to room raiding mini fridges. Hurry
Logan has the vodka and snickers. We're making a run for it. Room 302
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
Randomize
