dude chill. it wont be anything like your seventh grade birthday party.
She needs to learn what's it like to have sex with someone and regret it the next day.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
all i know is that each time we woke up we were at a different chinese restaurant. help.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
Wanna hang out? my DILF had to dip out for his sons little league game
He is just a personification of a vodka hangover.
Yes. Sex with questionable women, and made of potatoes.
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
and yet oddly the jello shots tasted better coming up than going down
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
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