Now I have to picture Dave Letterman having sex with all these women. Im the real victim.
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
Well don't pass out under a Swedish flag and people won't make assumptions
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
And by "have lunch together" you mean me giving you a blow job in the back of your Tahoe, right?
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