Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
separated laundry into 'got laid' and 'didn't get laid' piles.
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Sadly him cutting me out of the duct tape dress was NOT the most awkward part of the night. It was a littleeee moist under there.....
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
Drinking vodka straight from my water bottle because of the debate. I just need to forget.
Last year I got a dildo in the mail on my birthday. Today it was just a credit card bill. Sadface.
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize