So now everyone thinks I don't know what a condom is
How do I get over judging people who I would be exactly like if I had a boyfriend
Get a boyfriend
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
All I remember is saying that "fire will make it all better"
we've decided to start cutting you off when you can't figure out how to work an ipod.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
I have so many feelings about this burrito
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
after we got done having sex, you rolled over and ask what your yelp review was. So yea I'm kinda mad.
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
So I got a text from him saying "jacking off...thinking of you" I think I'm going to get a restraining order
Randomize
