I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
No I am not eating basil off your cock
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
Its hard to hear the music in here over his nasal whistle. And his breath smells like old milk. I think I need more vodka, and he better be buying. You owe me.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
He made the Waffle House lady get me out of the car. This isn't a joke.
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
It's a good thing vaginas don't have taste buds
Last night was great... In the "I got videotaped making out and getting a handjob on the couch in front of 100 people." kinda way.
i am currently wearing a bowl of frosting on my head. i do not regret any of my life choices leading to this moment
Randomize