So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
Why does everyone think all I do is drink? I go to class on wednesdays
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
Don't you ever say "drinking at 2" as if it's a bad thing again. I'm asking you as a friend here.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
hr gave me pretxwk salad and a doubke shot of grey goose. i approve! tou guys are a beautidil couple.
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
When the nurse referred to my vag as "your downstairs", I knew I found the perfect Doctors office.
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
how do i act around someone who's shoes i puked in while naked and blackout?
I just took a shot before my midterm. Gotta keep things in perspective.
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