I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
No, I didn't like him that much. But I took one for the team. And by the team I mean me and my vagina.
Getting too drunk for the hot dog vendor to serve me is possibly a sign of an alcohol problem. I threw up in the sewer grates next to his stand
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Woke up with a squirrel in my bed, how was your night?
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
The power of my boobs compel you
He was watching porn and riding a stationary bike in the living room
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
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