thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Well, according to foursquare I checked in "@under the bushes" at 3:27am. This could explain some things.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
Moral of the story: next time my plans include you and bourbon, I'm packing a toothbrush.
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I am sweating Crown. It all went wrong when the ratio hit 50-50
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
Randomize
