If you borrow your friends real doll, should you wear a condom?
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
She says she'll teach me how to make her squirt tonight so yea, I'm bailing again. I'm not sayin sorry since you don't have a better offer.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I couldn't find a lighter, so I smoked a bowl with a birthday candle.
My hungover walk of shame was interrupted by a stranger on a balcony throwing me a beer to shotgun... at 10 a.m....
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
You're the best friend ever. I wouldn't want to do the walk of shame with anyone else.
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
