She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
If it's not soft enough to fuck on, then we're not getting the new rug.
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
He kept calling my vagina a magic clam, and it was speaking to him, telling him to feed it his penis. I played along.
I told him I had AIDS after he bit me. His dad cried. I think I just ruined the little guy's 3rd birthday, but he had in coming.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
You are, as of last night, the self declared king of pooping. Long may you reign.
Randomize
