you still trying to smash that chick?
it's a losing battle and she kinda sucks. been busy with school so not getting midweek drunk - she's nearly unbearable sober
Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just woke up with streamers wrapped around me. Glitter in my hair. My fish are swimming in empty bottles of Barcardi. Helpppp
I literally had to tap out of the blow job. It was like a pornographic wrestling match
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
just cuz theres a goalie doesnt mean i cant commandeer the goal and become a way better goalie
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
I have this rep as a wingman for a reason. I'm like a poon caddy. "You might want to use a 9 iron on this hole. "
I'm gonna hop on that dick and ride it into the sunset
Have you ever been up at one in the morning and thought to yourself, "I do not know nearly enough about penguin reproduction"?
how the FUCK did i spend 25 dollars at 50 cent beer night?
Randomize