I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
i'm sitting in the library realizing that the 2 most productive things i did this weekend was have sex and go to the liquor store...
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I'm pretty sure I swallowed a whole condom
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
my mom called me mid shot and i accidentally answered and kept calling her my own name. somehow i thought that would help the situation.
Seriously, you just banged the guy that wishes his dog happy birthday on fb. That's fucking adorable!
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
I called him the wrong name all night, yet I still got a ride home from the party and hooked up with the guy. I'm irresistible.
Also I found $40 in the women's bathroom at ihop. Karma is finally kicking in!
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
He may be a manwhore, but he’s a very well endowed manwhore
That’s an important feature when it comes to a manwhore
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