i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
Dont even try and act like it wasn't you who made the sex tape of my dogs.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They had to restock the bar 3 times before midnight. There is a bridesmaid dress hanging in a tree outside.
After you vomited on the patrol car, you thanked the officer for helping you up off the ground. I don't think you realized you were being arrested.
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
I just got my evaluation. My manager told me he hated my guts and pretty much wanted to stab me in the face. Then he gave me an "exceeds expectations" on pretty much everything and a raise.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
The fact that you cheered yourself on while you puked saying it was your first college puke, blacked out, and sang taylor swift to the toilet confirms the fact that we are related. I've never been more proud.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize