STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
SEEEEXXX PLEASE
I bet a guy could be masturbating under the table now and people would just think he was clapping along.
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Someday soon you'll wake up next to a bottle of jameson and a half eaten lean cuisine and then you'll be just like me.
I almost masterbated to the avatar love scene ha it was so hot
I took the chef home. His dick even tasted like garlic
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
He fingered me and now wants me to go get plan b because of it. WE'RE IN COLLEGE.
HE'S LICKING FROSTING OFF OF THE EIGHTEEN YEAR OLD BOY
I consider any night I don't make out with someone a bad night. So I've been great.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
He's talking about me being Slave Princess Leia and how he'll chain me up. I don't have the heart to point out that he would be Jabba in that scenario...Is it bad that his lack of SW knowledge is destroying my lady boner?
He was like, I wanna take it slow. I took off my bra And I was like, either we have sex now or you get out.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
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