I like daylight savings. I don't care if it's 4 oclock it's not daydrinking if it's dark out
seek help.
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
This honesty session brought to you by jagermeister inc.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
No. I'm just saying it shows no signs of stopping. My dad was a man-whore well into his 50s.
So my dad just walked in on me with the same girl twice in 3 nights. I told him if he wants to see her tits to adleast admit it. All he did was smirk.
I have a boner and a quesadilla why aren't you here
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
Come over so we can have two person sex in this one person tent
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Randomize
