its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If you ever bitch out on 72oz margarita night again, this friendship is over
I've been timing it. He's been showering alone for 33 minutes. 4 minutes ago, he said "truth or dare." haven't heard anything since.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
My motherfucking vibrator ran out of batteries right when I was about to orgasm. It's like he's possessed everything sexual in my life and has compelled it to NOT SATISFY ME.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you were angry and didn't have anything else to throw so you threw a breakfast burrito...?
Do you remember when you first moved into my parents house with me and we came home to find that my dad bolted the headboard to the wall
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
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