Drawing on your hand and calling it yenifer lopez doesn't count!
dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
I just saw a guy in the gym riding the bicycle while watching baseball and dipping.
Why hello there Olivia! How are you today on this fine and most wonderful morning full of magic and adventure and awesomeness?
Someone just got laid.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
If this first date goes well and I like him, I won't sleep with him. But if it doesn't go well, I'll sleep with him.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
He got me to hold his phone, wallet, keys and pants while he hooked up with another girl.
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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