Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
Well, you're either very drunk or very high but I'll let it slide because I love any type of conversation concerning cheese.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Not a clue. But I did find out that his penis has a British accent.
I am playing a little game I like to call "How Quickly Can I Infuse This Vodka Into My Bloodstream Without the Use of an IV"
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Fuck you i've put so many pretzels in her shirt
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
